January 18, 2011

Bit of a rough evening

I am not an emotional person. Bottom line. But in this moment I am feeling somewhat teary about my grandmother's departure tomorrow. Not because I won't have help on a day to day basis, but I see how much my son enjoys being around her. The biggest smile spreads across his face when she walks into the room. It's her voice that has always been able to soothe him every since we brought him home from the hospital. Every night she would come in to my room and say that if I needed her help with the baby that she'd be in her room, not sleeping, and to come and get her. We had a rough couple of weeks around the 2nd month where X-man would cry during the witching hour and she would come to the rescue. The baby would just go to sleep in her arms.
Right now, less than 24 hours prior to her departure, I've let her sit and hold him in her arms while he sleeps rather than go relieve her for the evening. When I went in to see if she was ok with him, she told me to come back at 10:00pm so she could have more time with him.
What makes me sad is that she lives so far away. It's not like I can just hop on a plane for a couple of hours, or even for 5 hours. This is a transatlantic flight with a stopover, many hours. Not that we're never going to go visit, but it saddens me that I can't just drop in or that X-man will see her in the recent future. He just loves being with her and in a way I'm glad that he won't remember this time so that he doesn't feel her absence.
I am thankful that she is healthy enough to have been able to come and that she was able to be present for his birth, and for the first 5 months of his life. We were able to take a holiday to Mexico all together and we have many pictures of X-man with her and tons of video that I have shot so that he never forgets that his great-grandma was there for him in the beginning, spilling over with love for him. This time with my grandmother is something that I really wanted and I will forever be thankful for.

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